One of a Kind News

"Letter from Reader, Rick Matteson" May 15, 2001
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Table of Contents

1. Welcome Notes
2. Article – Letter From Reader, Rick Matteson
3. The Story Shared by Adelaide Donnelley
4. Words of Wisdom – How To Be An Artist, shared by Chuck
Kenmir
5. Resources

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1. Welcome Notes

Dear Friends,

I am excited to share with you that I am going to be a
grandmother again – this will make five grandchildren! My
daughter, Shelly and son-in-law, Greg are expecting a little one
on December 21st. We are all excited and eagerly awaiting the
arrival of another little angel – a Christmas angel!

After my article "What You Focus On Expands – Three Shining
Examples" in the last issue of One of a Kind News, I received a
wonderful letter from a colleague, Rick Matteson. I want to
share his letter in this issue. Also, my friend, Chuck Kenmir,
shared an inspiring and fun tidbit for my Words of Wisdom
section.

It's great having others contribute to One of a Kind News! I
almost feel guilty for not having to write very much myself. But,
as Judi Talesnick, one of the three shining examples says, "guilt
is only good for two things – it allows me to do it again and it
makes my mother happy".

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2. Letter From Reader, Rick Matteson

Sharon:

I just wanted to acknowledge you and the very fine postings you
have been mailing out. They are uplifting, loving and spirit-
filled. A true gift for whomever may read them. So thank you for
mailing them to me. They have not gone unappreciated.

I am forwarding to you a story that was sent to me by my sister
Adelaide Donnelley, (we call her "Daidie"). It reminded me of
your 3 inspirational life stories of people making the most with
what they are given. (Note: you will find this story in section 3)

My sister is 59 years old. She has been in private practice as a
Marriage & Family Therapist in California (Berkeley). You may
be interested to know that this past year she co-authored a book
called "SORROW MOUNTAIN: The Tale Of A Tibetan Warrior
Nun" (on Kodansha International Press). She was hired by
Richard Gere (the actor), Daniel Goleman (author of "Emotional
Intelligence), & Sharon Salzberg (author of "Lovingkindness") to
write the true-life story of her co-author Ani Pachen. Ani lives in
Dharamsala in India in a house adjacent to the Dalai Lama. She
is like a sister to him (he wrote the forward to the book).

Briefly, Ani was the only daughter of a Tibetan chief who led his
people against the Chinese when they invaded Tibet in the 50's.
He died during this struggle and Ani, who was deep into her
study to be a Buddhist nun, was persuaded by his followers to
lead them as her father had. She did so and was the only woman
to lead the Tibetans during that time of the Chinese invasion. She
was captured by the Chinese and imprisoned for 21 years in a
men's prison. During that time she was subjected to repeated
torture and degradation.

My sister has done a masterful job of bringing Ani's story alive
and (her story) is an inspiration to anyone who has triumphed
over any type of abuse. It is a testimony to the human spirit. I
was honored to have my sister & Ani as houseguests during part
of a national book tour when they read at Elliott Bay Bookstore
in Seattle. I thought that you and your clients/readers might find
it inspirational as they go forward in their personal growth and
meet life's challenges.

Thanks & keep up the good work!

Fredric "Rick" Matteson

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3. The Story Shared by Adelaide Donnelley

"On Nov. 18, 1995, Itzhak Perlman, the violinist, came on stage
to give a concert at Avery Fisher Hall at Lincoln Center in New
York City. If you have ever been to a Perlman concert, you
know that getting on stage is no small achievement for him. He
was stricken with polio as a child, and so he has braces on both
legs and walks with the aid of two crutches.

To see him walk across the stage one step at a time, painfully and
slowly, is an unforgettable sight. He walks painfully, yet
majestically, until he reaches his chair. Then he sits down,
slowly, puts his crutches on the floor, undoes the locks on his
legs, tucks one foot back and extends the other foot forward.
Then he bends down and picks up the violin, puts it under his
chin, nods to the conductor and proceeds to play.

By now, the audience is used to this ritual. They sit quietly while
he makes his way across the stage to his chair. They remain
reverently silent while he undoes the locks on his legs. They wait
until he is ready to play.

But this time, something went wrong. Just as he finished the first
few bars, one of the strings on his violin broke. You could hear it
snap – it went off like gunfire across the room. There was no
mistaking what that sound meant.

There was no mistaking what he had to do.

People who were there that night thought to themselves: "We
figured that he would have to get up, put on the locks again, pick
up the crutches and limp his way off stage - to either find another
violin or else find another string for this one."

But he didn't. Instead, he waited a moment, closed his eyes and
then signaled the conductor to begin again. The orchestra began,
and he played from where he had left off. And he played with
such passion and such power and such purity, as they had never
heard before. Of course, anyone knows that it is impossible to
play a symphonic work with just three strings. I know that, and
you know that, but that night Itzhak Perlman refused to know
that.

You could see him modulating, changing, and recomposing the
piece in his head. At one point, it sounded like he was de-tuning
the strings to get new sounds from them that they had never
made before.

When he finished, there was an awesome silence in the room.
And then people rose and cheered. There was an extraordinary
outburst of applause from every corner of the auditorium. We
were all on our feet, screaming and cheering, doing everything
we could to show how much we appreciated what he had done.

He smiled, wiped the sweat from his brow, raised his bow to
quiet us, and then he said, not boastfully, but in a quiet, pensive,
reverent tone, "You know, sometimes it is the artist's task to find
out how much music you can still make with what you have
left."

What a powerful line that is. It has stayed in my mind ever since
I heard it. And who knows? Perhaps that is the way of life - not
just for artists but for all of us.

So, perhaps our task in this shaky, fast-changing, bewildering
world in which we live is to make music, at first with all that we
have, and when that is no longer possible, to make music with
what we have left."
--From Houston Chronicle - Jack Riemer

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4. Words of Wisdom

Chuck Kenmir shared these wonderful words of wisdom:

How To Be An Artist

"Stay loose. Learn to watch snails. Plant impossible gardens.
Invite someone dangerous to tea. Make little signs that say
"YES" and post them all over your house. Make friends with
freedom and uncertainty. Look forward to dreams. Cry during
movies. Swing as high as you can on a swing set by moonlight.
Cultivate moods and refuse to be "responsible". Do it for love.
Take a lot of naps. Give money away. Do it now, the money
will follow. Believe in magic. Laugh a lot. Celebrate every
gorgeous moment. Take moonbaths. Have wild imaginings.
Have transformative dreams and be perfectly calm. Draw on the
walls. Read every day. Imagine yourself magic. Giggle with
children. Listen to old people. Open up, dive in, be free. Bless
yourself. Drive away fear. Play with everything. Entertain your
inner child, you are innocent. Build a fort with blankets. Get
wet. Hug trees. Write love letters."
--Sark

Thank you Chuck for sharing this. After reading it, I
immediately wanted to find a swing set and swing as high as I
could, build a fort with blankets and hug trees!

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4. Resources
Sorrow Mountain, The Journey Of A Tibetan Warrior Nun, by
Ani Pachen & Adelaide Donnelley.

I am half way through this book and am loving it. It is superbly
written. I am enjoying learning more about the Chinese invasion
of Tibet and the Tibetan people, including the Dalai Lama. At
times, it's difficult to read because of the atrocities delivered on
the Tibetan people. At the same time, the courage and strong
spirituality exhibited is very inspiring.

Rick offered that if any readers have questions for Adelaide, he
is willing to forward them to her. If you do have questions, send
them to me and I will forward them to Rick.

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Until we meet again, remember to:

Count your garden by the flowers,
Never by the leaves that fall.
Count your days by golden hours,
Don't remember clouds at all.
Count your nights by stars, not shadows.
Count your years with smiles, not tears.
Count your blessings, not your troubles.
Count your age by friends, not years.
--Author Unknown

Blessings to you and yours,

Sharon

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Sharon Demarte is a Personal, Professional & Business Coach.
She coaches individuals by telephone and Internet, helping her
clients close the gap between where they are and where they
want to be. Her clients come from all walks of life. She works
best with people who have a strong desire, a willingness to take
action, and are motivated to increase the quality of their lives –
sometimes even in difficult situations.

One of her specialties is working with Caregivers. She works
with caregivers to help them avoid caregiver burnout and
maintain their own health, well-being and quality of life while
caring for another. She also loves to work with people who are
Too Young To Retire – they are the age of customary retirement,
but choose to go on to yet another career.

If you are a person who wants more out of life and would like to
explore the possibilities of partnering with Sharon as your coach,
please contact her in whatever way is comfortable for you. By
email: demartes@nventure.com; by fax (confidential): 253-568-
0453; by telephone: 206-938-1867.

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Copyright © 2000, 2001 all rights reserved. Permission is
granted to reproduce, copy or distribute One of a Kind News so
long as this copyright notice and full information about
contacting the author is attached. The author of this newsletter
is: Sharon L. Demarte, M.A

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